Wednesday, December 15, 2010

Joy over sadness

I hate the moments when I feel like I am spiraling out. When I can seem to grab focus. I am overwhelmed with emotion and need. Need for control, need to feel loved, need to feel wanted. I simply need. I want to shop and I want to eat. Mostly I want to curl up in bed and cry. Cry it all out. Cry until I have no more energy and every fiber of my being exhausted.

Today is one of those days. It is gloomy and cold outside. I don't feel ready for Christmas. I feel guilty for not being home with Olivia to take care of her while she is sick.

One of those days when I need to pull myself up from my bootstraps. Count my blessing instead of my dwelling on the negative. Be joyful in this Christmas season instead of being overwhelmed.

So, I am going to smile and push back the tears. I choose to be joyful. I choose to be inspired. I choose to see the good. I choose to be forgiving. I choose to be appreciative.

I thank God for today. For I am truly blessed!

2 comments:

Stephanie said...

Oh Jenn I can totally relate, especially lately! It seems that lately I just want to weep and can't control anything. It seems that it comes with being a mom and can feel really lonely. Olivia is SO blessed to have you as a mom! We can't control everything, but remember that it is a good thing, God has better plans for us! I always just try to remain present in my life... if I spend time focusing on the negative and thinking about the what if's, I miss out on what is happening NOW! Hope you have a better week!

Photography said...

Hope you are feeling better now. I know what that feels like been there many a time. xxhugsxx